Another dimesnion of riding

On the way to work today I had a very fun and interesting experience where several worlds crossed, linked and fled. I was coming up to the best scariest part of the ride where traffic jam meets hill and bus lane when I noticed a starbucks goer mount his sidewalk locked fixed bike and begin to pedal. Imagine worrying about a fart whilst riding public transit and that will give you an indication of about how much thought I gave him. I got caught at light where I was forced to notice the dollar value of yet another kind of bike rider that has more money than me. The road rider or fxxk head as I have come to know them. The evil scowl tucked under a $300 helmet as they click in and check their eye pods to make sure their rolling stones are rolling. I knew the roader would take off and leave me wondering why I hadn't invested in more than cut off dickies on this frigid 16 degree morning but he didn't..... he waited for what seemed like a female orgasm, mythically long, and then the fixed gear rider pulled off of the sidewalk in front of us. He rode the road. I have seen many a thing during my commute but a fixed rider on the road, in the morning, pedalling blew me away. I guess he felt the same kind " I am fxxked now, shit son" feeling because he began to pedal backwards and skid and fishtail and skid and check coffee and skid. The road rider held and held and held so I figured they both were retarded and passed and passed. I gave the fixed rider a "why the hell did you even bother trying to ride on the road" type look and then I heard a scary guttural challenge uttered from behind, not without comedy. I had that monster from the closet is chasing me feeling and didn't want to look back until the road guy expensive bike rider passed me shouting, in English, ATTACK! We road to the top of the hill and kept going throught the city. We talked and he was a funny fxxker because we live near to each other and he kept telling about how far I ride. I liked trying to keep up with him and he liked talking so it was great till we hit the core and split off. At that point in my day I didn't know that the best thing ever was waiting at home. The lurker had picked this up and gave it to me as a present. I had no idea what to make of it so I decided to slay a dragon with it and the dragon turned out to be beer despite having to work early tomorrow. The tool can adjust anything on a bike and even turn into a bikestand!!!!! I will scan and save the details later but that's not all! It can be used by ninjas as weapons! Oh, how they fought! But this is a truly special post because this is post where I finally reveal the lurker to you all, as in gee. This is the post where you can lay eyes upon the the pure nakedness of the LURKER>>>>>>>>>>>